I met my goal by the skin of my nose!!!! So I'm down another 12 lbs to 278! Bye bye 280s!
I'm debating my next goal. I feel like 10 pounds a month should be easily attainable, however, I struggled to get 12 pounds this month. Then there's the school trip and a week of vacation. But I think I can! If I have the goal if will motivate me to make good choices!
So after much 'Jodi Logic' and rambling, my goal is to lose 10 pounds by July 31!!
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
The Evil Sodium Monster!
This weekend we went to Waco to see Kurt's family. We knew we would not be eating at home so I prepared my mind for making good decisions and remembering that I'm not in bondage to food. The morning started out with a failed trip to Subway because they don't open until 8! We went to IHop instead and I got a 330 calorie omelet with fruit bowl. Not bad. Lunch was ready at Kurt's mom's just 2 1/2 hrs later!! So I put only a few things on my plate and ate an early lunch and did not go back to eat more even though it was yummy! Dinner came early because by 4:30 I had already reached the hungry, grouchy stage. We went to fazolis and I got a 400 calorie ravioli. Not too bad for a day of out to eat. I thought about all my choices and purposely chose to not go for seconds and snack.
On Sunday some friends from Waco came to visit us!! It was great fun and I ate great at home...until dinner. We ended the day with the Howard's at Cabela's and went our separate ways. It was 6 and we were hungry and needed groceries so we went to Noodles and had Phó. As much as I love Phó and it's fresh ingredients, I know it has tons of sodium!
I woke up Monday morning having gained 6 pounds! At first I was so mad because I worked so hard to make good choices this weekend!! Then I realized, it was probably mostly water weight and getting upset isn't going to help anything. In fact, by midday I was already down 2 pounds as I drowned myself in water all day! I woke up Tuesday and was down another 2. Now I don't know if I'll make my goal of 278 (I was 284 this morning) by Saturday a.m. and get my massage but I'm sure going to work hard the rest of the week and know that my best reward will be being proud of myself for not giving up even if it looks hopeless!!
On Sunday some friends from Waco came to visit us!! It was great fun and I ate great at home...until dinner. We ended the day with the Howard's at Cabela's and went our separate ways. It was 6 and we were hungry and needed groceries so we went to Noodles and had Phó. As much as I love Phó and it's fresh ingredients, I know it has tons of sodium!
I woke up Monday morning having gained 6 pounds! At first I was so mad because I worked so hard to make good choices this weekend!! Then I realized, it was probably mostly water weight and getting upset isn't going to help anything. In fact, by midday I was already down 2 pounds as I drowned myself in water all day! I woke up Tuesday and was down another 2. Now I don't know if I'll make my goal of 278 (I was 284 this morning) by Saturday a.m. and get my massage but I'm sure going to work hard the rest of the week and know that my best reward will be being proud of myself for not giving up even if it looks hopeless!!
Friday, June 22, 2012
A Little Perspective
Sometimes it's hard to stare 'I still need to lose at least 100 more pounds' in the face even though I've already lost 50 (okay, 53)!! So last night Kurt and I were looking at some old photos. If you're struggling with seeing how far you've really come or with how far you really have to go, go find some old photos!!!
Celebrate how far I've come with me!!
Celebrate how far I've come with me!!
 |
| October 2010 - 335 |
 |
| November 2010 - 335 |
 |
| February 2012 - 316 |
 |
| May 2012 - 288 |
Monday, June 18, 2012
Long Time Coming...An Update
Okay, so I've been avoiding blogging. I kept wanting to write but the task of catching everybody up on my progress seemed so daunting. Today...the procrastination ends!
Seasons: Anybody who's is 'friends' with me on Facebook, knows that I have been continuing my journey and not just given up because I haven't posted. I have, however, been going thru different seasons. Right after my last post, my life got drastically busier with the start of 'testing season' at school. Since my job as Data Analyst/Test Coordinator is to organize and plan testing for all state mandated tests on campus, my job gets harder in the spring. I was not expecting it to be quite as busy as it was, but I'm out on the other side and can tell you, I SURVIVED!!! I will call this my season of BALANCE. I was able to maintain my weight-loss to date (within 4 pounds up or down) and I was successfully able to not let stress effect the way I ate (most of the time). I also had a season of DOUBT, but I'll get to that later.
90 Day Challenge: The 90 Day Challenge that Northwood Church hosted was from March-May. Laurie Graves did an amazing job with Spirit-Filled teaching on what the Bible says about our bodies and weight loss, as well as giving us practical tips and allowing us to have a safe place for accountability. During the 90 Day Challenge there were some amazing life changes in people who attended. It wasn't just about weight-loss. Without getting your mind right, the weight-loss will be in vain. I can happily say that even though I maintained my weight for the most part, that I worked diligently to lose my FEAR OR FAILURE that has haunted me for a long time in this journey. I had let my fear of failure convince me to purposely sabotage my weight-loss efforts so that I had a 'reason' why I didn't lose, just in case I didn't lose. It was a cycle of me not trusting God and believing that He would take care of me.
Challenges: I have struggled a little bit since summer has started. When you have a 'spiritual high' like the 90 Day Challenge and know that you've let go of things (like my fear of failure) it's easy to live almost care-free thinking you are on top of the world! So after the 90 Day Challenge ended, I forgot to cling to God to continue to help me and some of my old thoughts crept back in. Thankfully I didn't gain weight back, but my mind wasn't right. Probably, the only reason I didn't gain was that there wasn't any 'bad' food in the house...thankfully!! It was just yesterday that I realized what I was doing, subconsciously. I had let go of this fear of failure, but I had inadvertently thought that I could then stop clinging to God to help me...SILLY ME!!! So, I will call this my season of DOUBT. I am thankful for Kurt who gently pointed out to me that I had not been doing things the same as before.
Weight Review:
335 - Early 2011
325 - January 2012
317 - February 2012
297 - March 2012
284 - CURRENTLY
That's all for now. I will try my best to keep this updated more frequently now! I have a goal...12 pounds by June 30th. If I meet me goal, I get a MASSAGE!!! I've lost 6 pounds, 6 more to go!!!
Seasons: Anybody who's is 'friends' with me on Facebook, knows that I have been continuing my journey and not just given up because I haven't posted. I have, however, been going thru different seasons. Right after my last post, my life got drastically busier with the start of 'testing season' at school. Since my job as Data Analyst/Test Coordinator is to organize and plan testing for all state mandated tests on campus, my job gets harder in the spring. I was not expecting it to be quite as busy as it was, but I'm out on the other side and can tell you, I SURVIVED!!! I will call this my season of BALANCE. I was able to maintain my weight-loss to date (within 4 pounds up or down) and I was successfully able to not let stress effect the way I ate (most of the time). I also had a season of DOUBT, but I'll get to that later.
90 Day Challenge: The 90 Day Challenge that Northwood Church hosted was from March-May. Laurie Graves did an amazing job with Spirit-Filled teaching on what the Bible says about our bodies and weight loss, as well as giving us practical tips and allowing us to have a safe place for accountability. During the 90 Day Challenge there were some amazing life changes in people who attended. It wasn't just about weight-loss. Without getting your mind right, the weight-loss will be in vain. I can happily say that even though I maintained my weight for the most part, that I worked diligently to lose my FEAR OR FAILURE that has haunted me for a long time in this journey. I had let my fear of failure convince me to purposely sabotage my weight-loss efforts so that I had a 'reason' why I didn't lose, just in case I didn't lose. It was a cycle of me not trusting God and believing that He would take care of me.
 |
| From February-May |
Weight Review:
335 - Early 2011
325 - January 2012
317 - February 2012
297 - March 2012
284 - CURRENTLY
That's all for now. I will try my best to keep this updated more frequently now! I have a goal...12 pounds by June 30th. If I meet me goal, I get a MASSAGE!!! I've lost 6 pounds, 6 more to go!!!
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Some Deep Thoughts on Last Week
So this past week has been the very busiest in many, many years. As test coordinator at Eastern Hills High School I am in charge of organizing, prepping and maintaining security for all the state mandated testing. Any educators out there understand what a huge task that must be for a campus of 1200. Plus, not to mention that this year our 9th graders are on STAAR and 10-12 are still on TAKS. It's a crazy world. Well, the short of it is that I had NO idea what a huge task it really was. I knew everything that needed to be done. I knew how to do it all. What I didn't anticipate was how LONG everything would take! Not to mention that the campus was crazy with 3 administrators gone all week. So, as Tuesday night came and I HAD to have everything ready for Wednesday morning, I had a panic attack. Almost literally. It was 6:30 and I realized that even if I pulled an all-nighter all the labels wouldn't get on the books and answer documents and all my folders wouldn't get made. I felt sick at my stomach and the thought of food made me want to puke even though I hadn't eaten since around 10:00 that morning. It was in that moment that I felt like I saw a HUGE neon sign said, "Jodi, you can't do this alone. You need help!"
I don't like to admit that I need help on something. I like to take credit for things. There's this guilt complex that starts to happen when I ask for help and I feel horrible for inconveniencing somebody else. But, in this instance, I had NO choice. I remember a co-worke/friend saying as she left for the evening, "are you sure you don't need anything else?" and like a robot I replied, "No, I'm fine". So, while holding back tears, I called her and said I needed help. She got dressed and came up to the school to help. Together we did what would have taken me all night in about 2 1/2 hours! So we left the school at 9:30 and each of us brought a few things home to complete. On the way home, I fell apart and sobbed. I called my sister and was so thankful she answered the phone. She prayed for me and just listened to me vent almost the entire way home. I am so blessed to have her to call and any time when I need it. As soon as I got home I fell apart again in Kurt's arms. I think I'd been holding that cry in for a good while. He took everything out of my hands, made me sit at the kitchen table and eat something. Again, I'm so blessed to be surrounded by so much support! So thinking back to my feelings: I felt stupid for not asking for help sooner (part of it was pride but part of it was honestly not knowing how long it would take). But now I know!! I know I must rely on others.
Now isn't that so much like our spiritual life? Are you like me and don't feel worthy to ask for help spiritually. In meditating on these thoughts this week, I found that this 'not asking for help' thing is a major issue for me. I feel bad when I ask for a prayer request. How silly is that? I guess I'm just a 'jolly Jodi' and so when I have an issue I try to see the best in it. That doesn't make sense. Anyway, I've yet to get to the root of all of this in my life, but I have committed to try to more transparent with my needs. What are your thoughts? Any suggestions for getting out of this 'not seeking help' complex I have discovered I have?
So, as far as weight-loss goes this week....I didn't lose anything. I gained 1 pound. I didn't workout at all. I was up until almost 1am every night and out the door at 5:30 every morning getting things ready for the testing. I tried to eat good, but I often had to settle for a Lara Bar or Cliff Bar instead of my salad and veggies. So overall I'm happy to have only gained 1 pound. I was afraid that after 4 weeks of being so strict that my body would revolt and gain a lot. Since I was kind of out of it nutrition-wise last week, I'm finding it hard to kick back into it. I don't want to go to the gym. But I will and I am in the morning. I'm just hoping that once I go tomorrow morning I will live off that adrenaline feeling and will yearn for it again. I'm not stopping by any means, just feeling less motivated.
I don't like to admit that I need help on something. I like to take credit for things. There's this guilt complex that starts to happen when I ask for help and I feel horrible for inconveniencing somebody else. But, in this instance, I had NO choice. I remember a co-worke/friend saying as she left for the evening, "are you sure you don't need anything else?" and like a robot I replied, "No, I'm fine". So, while holding back tears, I called her and said I needed help. She got dressed and came up to the school to help. Together we did what would have taken me all night in about 2 1/2 hours! So we left the school at 9:30 and each of us brought a few things home to complete. On the way home, I fell apart and sobbed. I called my sister and was so thankful she answered the phone. She prayed for me and just listened to me vent almost the entire way home. I am so blessed to have her to call and any time when I need it. As soon as I got home I fell apart again in Kurt's arms. I think I'd been holding that cry in for a good while. He took everything out of my hands, made me sit at the kitchen table and eat something. Again, I'm so blessed to be surrounded by so much support! So thinking back to my feelings: I felt stupid for not asking for help sooner (part of it was pride but part of it was honestly not knowing how long it would take). But now I know!! I know I must rely on others.
Now isn't that so much like our spiritual life? Are you like me and don't feel worthy to ask for help spiritually. In meditating on these thoughts this week, I found that this 'not asking for help' thing is a major issue for me. I feel bad when I ask for a prayer request. How silly is that? I guess I'm just a 'jolly Jodi' and so when I have an issue I try to see the best in it. That doesn't make sense. Anyway, I've yet to get to the root of all of this in my life, but I have committed to try to more transparent with my needs. What are your thoughts? Any suggestions for getting out of this 'not seeking help' complex I have discovered I have?
So, as far as weight-loss goes this week....I didn't lose anything. I gained 1 pound. I didn't workout at all. I was up until almost 1am every night and out the door at 5:30 every morning getting things ready for the testing. I tried to eat good, but I often had to settle for a Lara Bar or Cliff Bar instead of my salad and veggies. So overall I'm happy to have only gained 1 pound. I was afraid that after 4 weeks of being so strict that my body would revolt and gain a lot. Since I was kind of out of it nutrition-wise last week, I'm finding it hard to kick back into it. I don't want to go to the gym. But I will and I am in the morning. I'm just hoping that once I go tomorrow morning I will live off that adrenaline feeling and will yearn for it again. I'm not stopping by any means, just feeling less motivated.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Blessings, Surprises and an Update
You know, when I started this journey I knew I was supposed to do this, however, I had NO idea that impact that would be had on those around me. I also had no idea how blessing would be turned right around on me. Let me share a few things with you.
Yesterday while heading to Kroger Marketplace to get groceries for our week, I realized I needed gas. I pulled up to the Kroger gas station and politely (or not so politely) handed Kurt my Kroger Plus Card so he could get gas. He was in the middle of writing a message on his phone so I hop out to pump gas (but admitingly not happy with it). Anyway, I get out and start pumping and a gentleman approaches me. He asks if I go to Northwood Church. I say yes and he proceeds to tell me how he thinks I'm such an inspiration and he admires my bravery. WOW, what a surprise! A complete stranger approaching me about getting up on stage and sharing my weight-loss with everyone. I knew people I know are supporting me but it's really cool to think that complete strangers are rooting for me too! After I got back in the car I realized why I was supposed to be the one pumping gas last night!
We've received many blessing this past week as well. I want to share them with you so you can rejoice in what God is doing in our lives.
Yesterday while heading to Kroger Marketplace to get groceries for our week, I realized I needed gas. I pulled up to the Kroger gas station and politely (or not so politely) handed Kurt my Kroger Plus Card so he could get gas. He was in the middle of writing a message on his phone so I hop out to pump gas (but admitingly not happy with it). Anyway, I get out and start pumping and a gentleman approaches me. He asks if I go to Northwood Church. I say yes and he proceeds to tell me how he thinks I'm such an inspiration and he admires my bravery. WOW, what a surprise! A complete stranger approaching me about getting up on stage and sharing my weight-loss with everyone. I knew people I know are supporting me but it's really cool to think that complete strangers are rooting for me too! After I got back in the car I realized why I was supposed to be the one pumping gas last night!
We've received many blessing this past week as well. I want to share them with you so you can rejoice in what God is doing in our lives.
- Somebody has purchased me the knee brace that I needed!
- We received a gift card to Sprouts!
- We received spending cash for Kurt's trip to Vietnam and a small stash for me!
- We received money to purchase Kurt a new professional wardrobe!
God is so good!! Kurt's work clothes no longer looked professional because they were all baggy. Our grocery budget has slightly expanded and I really needed a knee brace to maximize my workouts!
Also a weight-loss update. I lost 3 pounds this week!! This week has literally been the busiest all school year for me as Test Coordinator and Data Analyst and I'm thrilled to have lost 3 pounds. I was only able to make it to two of our three workouts and I only went to the gym one morning. Next week will look very similar to this past week. I'm so ready for Spring Break....5 more days!!!!!!
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Over But Not Done!
Okay, so the 'Losing It' series at church is done, however my journey is very far from done. I hope that you continue to follow my journey.
This week Kurt and I are doing a cleanse with a no meat and no carbs (except from veggies). It's amazing how little can satisfy me now. I mean, in a heart beat I could stuff my face but the actual amount of food that it takes to satisfy me is not much. On Sunday Pastor Bob talked about following God's plan should be a continual state of rest. Although this week is absolutely crazy-busy at work with the first HUGE TAKS test coming next week, feel at peace and restful with the way things are going. Today while working, I was beginning to maybe see part of the bigger picture of things in my life. It was encouraging.
Workouts this week are lighter due to the lower amount of food we are eating. Tonight's workout was tough, but mostly because my body was a little weaker. I would have flat passed out if we had worked as hard as last week tonight!! Speaking of hard workouts last week. I was so proud of myself for climbing the BIG hill on Saturday. It was so hard. I literally had to keep reminding myself that I just had to put one foot in front of the other. I was out of breath; I was sweating profusely; every muscle in my body ached. But I did it. I climbed that hill 3 times!! This is the top of the hill. That little bitty park just off my right shoulder is the bottom!!
This week Kurt and I are doing a cleanse with a no meat and no carbs (except from veggies). It's amazing how little can satisfy me now. I mean, in a heart beat I could stuff my face but the actual amount of food that it takes to satisfy me is not much. On Sunday Pastor Bob talked about following God's plan should be a continual state of rest. Although this week is absolutely crazy-busy at work with the first HUGE TAKS test coming next week, feel at peace and restful with the way things are going. Today while working, I was beginning to maybe see part of the bigger picture of things in my life. It was encouraging.
Workouts this week are lighter due to the lower amount of food we are eating. Tonight's workout was tough, but mostly because my body was a little weaker. I would have flat passed out if we had worked as hard as last week tonight!! Speaking of hard workouts last week. I was so proud of myself for climbing the BIG hill on Saturday. It was so hard. I literally had to keep reminding myself that I just had to put one foot in front of the other. I was out of breath; I was sweating profusely; every muscle in my body ached. But I did it. I climbed that hill 3 times!! This is the top of the hill. That little bitty park just off my right shoulder is the bottom!!
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Losing It finale
The series at Northwood that helped catapult my journey is over, however, my journey is far from over! Besides the fact that Laurie is going to keep working with us for another week, I still have about 125 pounds to lose!!! On to my results!!!
I lost another 5 pounds this week! That's a total of 19 pounds in 21 days!
I wanted to post a quick update to let everyone know about the final weigh in. I will write more later on my thoughts about the whole thing. Right now I'm exhausted from my evening of prepping for the week. Luckily I know it will get easier and quicker!
Thanks for following me thus far and please continue to do so. I need you support and encouragement to get thru.
I lost another 5 pounds this week! That's a total of 19 pounds in 21 days!
I wanted to post a quick update to let everyone know about the final weigh in. I will write more later on my thoughts about the whole thing. Right now I'm exhausted from my evening of prepping for the week. Luckily I know it will get easier and quicker!
Thanks for following me thus far and please continue to do so. I need you support and encouragement to get thru.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Thursday Thoughts
I'll share a few thoughts that I've kept in my notes app on my phone until I had time to write.
- Luke 15:11-29 - The Parable of the Prodigal Son. I am so lucky to have a Heavenly Father who has treated me as a 'prodigal son' as I've finally come full circle in my obedience in the area of my weight. I was lost for many, many years. Yet when I was ready to 'come home', He welcomed me with open arms, threw a party and invited all His friends. How blessed am I that I have a loving husband who would also treat me the same. I've let Kurt down so many times by saying that I was ready to 'get serious' only to turn around and sabotage myself shortly afterwards. I'm so blessed!!
- Kurt and I have a very different journey to weight-loss, but we can still very much take it together. Kurt is about 50 pounds away from his goal where I am about 125 pounds away from my goal. He's excited about getting in to goal weight clothes and running a 5K or more. I'm excited about being able to walk up the stairs without huffing and puffing so bad that I can't talk. Our journey's are different, but I know that Kurt is going to be there to support me all the way thru my journey even when he's at goal.
- It stinks. It stinks that I never really fully accepted that I was a size 26. I was squeezing into most of my 24s. In fact, I only owned two pair of 26 pants. So I know I've lost a good amount of weight, but I'm ready to shed these clothes! I want to wear something new or at least something from the 'other' side of my closet. It's great that my clothes actually fit now, but they're still the same clothes. I don't think it'll be long until I'm in a 22, but until then I'm stuck with the same clothes. (Just a little vent! I said it would get real in here!!)
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Sunday's Victory
I just realized I didn't post on my blog my official weigh-in update. It was in the pictures, but not in a post.
I LOST ANOTHER 5 POUNDS!!! 14 pounds in 2 weeks...a pound a day!!
I'm excited to see what this week brings. My goal is to at least be 'free from three'...out of the 300s forever!!
Not much to update this week. I'm treking along on this journey.
A few prayer requests!
I LOST ANOTHER 5 POUNDS!!! 14 pounds in 2 weeks...a pound a day!!
I'm excited to see what this week brings. My goal is to at least be 'free from three'...out of the 300s forever!!
Not much to update this week. I'm treking along on this journey.
A few prayer requests!
- Work is getting really busy as I prepare for the first spring rounds of TAKS/STAAR testing. I'm realizing how hard it is going to be in a few weeks when I'm really stressed not to fall back into bad eating habits. You can begin to pray for me now. The month of March is going to be stressful.
- Pray for my left knee. I have previously had 3 surgeries (but the last was over 15 years ago) on it to correct some hereditary positioning issues. My knee is really bothering me. I've been having pain and it's been giving out some and just doesn't feel right. The knee braces in the store don't fit around my leg and it costs $50 to order one that might work online (we can't purchase one right now). Please pray for healing.
- Pray for Kurt. He leaves for Vietnam in 3 1/2 short weeks!!
Thank you so much for joining me on this journey and encouraging me. I'm so happy to be finally moving forward with this area in my life.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Wake-up!
I Corinthians 6:19-20
Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
Wake Up!! Don’t you see? The Holy Spirit lives inside you and inside of me.
He lives inside us and make us his home. Is He comfortable or does he feel all cramped and alone?
I hear you say, “I don’t have a fancy house, I’m not made of wealth”, but can you at least say, “Everything’s put away on the shelf?”
“No.” You say. Is it a mess or full of junk? Now aren’t you embarrassed that the Holy Spirit, King of Kings, Lord of Lords abides amidst this funk?
The things you put in your body should add fuel to the fire; to do God’s will and never, ever tire.
The things in your body should not hold you down; depress you, suppress you or keep you from moving around.
This freedom we have came at a very costly price. God has made the ultimate sacrifice.
You see this body that you have that you claim is full of junk, messed up and decayed, has been purchased by the pain and suffering of Jesus’ death on that gloomy day.
All those tears, all that pain, all the suffering that happened, was it all done in vain?
Surely you can now come to agree all the responsibility we have because Jesus hung on that tree.
Honor your body and in turn you honor our God, our Creator and our Maker.
Jodi Pafford
4/6/2011
Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
Wake Up!! Don’t you see? The Holy Spirit lives inside you and inside of me.
He lives inside us and make us his home. Is He comfortable or does he feel all cramped and alone?
I hear you say, “I don’t have a fancy house, I’m not made of wealth”, but can you at least say, “Everything’s put away on the shelf?”
“No.” You say. Is it a mess or full of junk? Now aren’t you embarrassed that the Holy Spirit, King of Kings, Lord of Lords abides amidst this funk?
The things you put in your body should add fuel to the fire; to do God’s will and never, ever tire.
The things in your body should not hold you down; depress you, suppress you or keep you from moving around.
This freedom we have came at a very costly price. God has made the ultimate sacrifice.
You see this body that you have that you claim is full of junk, messed up and decayed, has been purchased by the pain and suffering of Jesus’ death on that gloomy day.
All those tears, all that pain, all the suffering that happened, was it all done in vain?
Surely you can now come to agree all the responsibility we have because Jesus hung on that tree.
Honor your body and in turn you honor our God, our Creator and our Maker.
Jodi Pafford
4/6/2011
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Milestones and Convictions
MILESTONES: One of the great things about rapid weight-loss and shocking your body suddenly eating right is that you reach milestones quickly. I want you to celebrate some of them with me.
CONVICTIONS: Even though I've surrendered my weight-loss to God, it's easy to slip back into the 'I' mode of it. I found myself 3 times since Saturday thinking negative thoughts about not being able to do it or thinking 'wow, look at ME' thoughts. I checked myself each time and remind myself that it's not about me, it's all about God. As cliche as it sounds, I have found myself literally shouting, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength!" to get through a workout set. I did that tonight while doing wall squats and I was able to make it the entire time (with lots of moaning and grunting, of course)! Yes, it's a cliche phrase, but think about how true it is. God gave me my body and the strength I have to move comes only from Him.
My biggest conviction came from some discouragement this week. I keep stepping on the scale over and over wondering how much I had lost. I became discouraged when I realized I hadn't dropped very much. I was eating between 1200 and 1500 calories. I never once put anything in my mouth that wasn't on the meal plan. I was doing extra workouts...12 workouts in a week rather than just 10. Then all of a sudden it was as if God slapped me in the face only it was that still small voice in my gut that I knew was Him. He said, "Get off that scale and don't get back on!!". Yes, Lord!! So, as of this morning I will not be weighing myself until I step on the scale at Northwood on Sunday morning. This journey is not all mine, it's the Lord's. If I lose 2 or 3 pounds, great; if I lose 7 or 8 pounds, great. Whatever I lose is from Him and of His will. What could be more perfect than that?
- I can do push-ups! In 2011 I was doing push-ups on the wall and they were tough!
- I did 10 sit-ups with a 6 pound ball!!!!! This milestone almost made me cry. On Tuesday I asked Laurie when I'd be able to do a sit-up as I was struggling to keep up with the others and couldn't even imagine doing a sit-up. Just two days later I did sit-ups. The momentum of the 6 pound ball helped, but 2 days ago I had a 6 pound ball and couldn't do it! I'll also say that this was the 44th out of 45th exercise of the night!!!!!!
- I did suicide drills without stopping down and back almost the entire length of Laurie's driveway.
- A major milestone has been realizing just how strong I am. I'm doing all these exercises carrying around 300 pounds. God's going to allow me to do awesome things when I'm carrying way less than 300 pounds!!
CONVICTIONS: Even though I've surrendered my weight-loss to God, it's easy to slip back into the 'I' mode of it. I found myself 3 times since Saturday thinking negative thoughts about not being able to do it or thinking 'wow, look at ME' thoughts. I checked myself each time and remind myself that it's not about me, it's all about God. As cliche as it sounds, I have found myself literally shouting, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength!" to get through a workout set. I did that tonight while doing wall squats and I was able to make it the entire time (with lots of moaning and grunting, of course)! Yes, it's a cliche phrase, but think about how true it is. God gave me my body and the strength I have to move comes only from Him.
My biggest conviction came from some discouragement this week. I keep stepping on the scale over and over wondering how much I had lost. I became discouraged when I realized I hadn't dropped very much. I was eating between 1200 and 1500 calories. I never once put anything in my mouth that wasn't on the meal plan. I was doing extra workouts...12 workouts in a week rather than just 10. Then all of a sudden it was as if God slapped me in the face only it was that still small voice in my gut that I knew was Him. He said, "Get off that scale and don't get back on!!". Yes, Lord!! So, as of this morning I will not be weighing myself until I step on the scale at Northwood on Sunday morning. This journey is not all mine, it's the Lord's. If I lose 2 or 3 pounds, great; if I lose 7 or 8 pounds, great. Whatever I lose is from Him and of His will. What could be more perfect than that?
Monday, February 13, 2012
Bye-Bye 9 Pounds!
Sunday was the first weigh in at Northwood Church. I weighed again in front of the whole church to see how much I lost during our first week of competition. It was really nerve-racking not knowing until that moment during first service. All of 'Team Graves' did great! I lost 9 pounds in one week!!! I was thinking 7 or 8, so 9 was a nice surprise. I lost nearly 2 bags of flour! Next time you're in the grocery store look at a bag of flour and think about me. Two bags of flour in pounds, gross!! Bye-Bye...good riddance!!!
One of my favorite things about doing this is that it's really just real life. I'm eating great food that I'm preparing, I haven't quite my job, I still have obligations and I still have 'real life' that gets in the way. BUT...I still lost 9 pounds in one week. You see, I used to tell myself that I couldn't work out everyday because I had to let my muscles rest. I have NO idea where I heard that, but I took it as truth for a LONG time. Then I got inspired. Toward the end of last season of Biggest Loser they did a 'day in the life of' type segment on Sunny after she returned home. It showed her doing boot camp in the morning before work then going home and doing more in the evening with a trainer. Something clicked inside me. She's an educator; she's from DFW; she can do it-so can I. I was inspired by her to get started but the real strength to get it done has come from God.
Last year I worked-out with Laurie Graves and did a bible study and fitness program with her thru Northwood Church. I loved the study and enjoyed the workout. The problem was, I wasn't in God's word and most importantly I wasn't ready to let go of 'me' in the equation of weight-loss. I was so sore from working out that I had to use a table or chair to brace myself when I got in or out of a chair. Getting out of our platform bed was a painful nightmare.
I used to think:
-isn't it great what I can do
-look at me, I've lost 3 pounds
-I'm so strong, look what I can do
Everything was focused on what I could do. I have now come to realize how little I can really do on my own. I must have God by my side guiding my steps and telling me what to do. I must realize that it is God's strength inside of me that allows me to do this. It is God's strength inside of me that allows me to not be very sore even after 2 work-outs per day. It's God's strength inside of me that helps me stand in the kitchen for 2 hours straight on Sunday night prepping food for the week. It's God's strength inside me that pushes me to finish running around the volleyball court in 34 degree weather while pulling a 50 pound punching bag! God's strength is amazing!!!!!
One of my favorite things about doing this is that it's really just real life. I'm eating great food that I'm preparing, I haven't quite my job, I still have obligations and I still have 'real life' that gets in the way. BUT...I still lost 9 pounds in one week. You see, I used to tell myself that I couldn't work out everyday because I had to let my muscles rest. I have NO idea where I heard that, but I took it as truth for a LONG time. Then I got inspired. Toward the end of last season of Biggest Loser they did a 'day in the life of' type segment on Sunny after she returned home. It showed her doing boot camp in the morning before work then going home and doing more in the evening with a trainer. Something clicked inside me. She's an educator; she's from DFW; she can do it-so can I. I was inspired by her to get started but the real strength to get it done has come from God.
Last year I worked-out with Laurie Graves and did a bible study and fitness program with her thru Northwood Church. I loved the study and enjoyed the workout. The problem was, I wasn't in God's word and most importantly I wasn't ready to let go of 'me' in the equation of weight-loss. I was so sore from working out that I had to use a table or chair to brace myself when I got in or out of a chair. Getting out of our platform bed was a painful nightmare.
I used to think:
-isn't it great what I can do
-look at me, I've lost 3 pounds
-I'm so strong, look what I can do
Everything was focused on what I could do. I have now come to realize how little I can really do on my own. I must have God by my side guiding my steps and telling me what to do. I must realize that it is God's strength inside of me that allows me to do this. It is God's strength inside of me that allows me to not be very sore even after 2 work-outs per day. It's God's strength inside of me that helps me stand in the kitchen for 2 hours straight on Sunday night prepping food for the week. It's God's strength inside me that pushes me to finish running around the volleyball court in 34 degree weather while pulling a 50 pound punching bag! God's strength is amazing!!!!!
Friday, February 10, 2012
Week in Review...as of Friday
The week didn't exactly go as planned. That's not a bad thing, really. This week just didn't go as 'I' had planned!!
Joseph started coughing Sunday evening and by Tuesday he was home from school with fever and strep. Thankfully Kurt was able to stay home. This threw off workout routines since I was up most of the night. It threw off our evening meal prep routine.
Funny thing is, this was part of Gods plan. We really had no intention on going to the marriage conference at church this weekend. It's not that we didn't want to but we couldn't really afford it and with all the prep involved in the meals we needed the weekend to do laundry, shop and prep. Well we stopped and prayed about it and decided that if God could provided funding and childcare we would go. God provided all of that!!! Then when Joseph got sick, it was a blessing in disguise because Kurt was able to get a head start on tidying the house and doing laundry while home with Joseph.
Food: I've really enjoyed most meals. I love cooking and after being scared to cook fish, I've become pretty good and it sounds good. I have not been toyed by food. I've been around be food but I've not been tempted to eat!!!
I wanted to get some thoughts down while they were on my mind. However, I'm falling asleep. I better listen and write more later.
Joseph started coughing Sunday evening and by Tuesday he was home from school with fever and strep. Thankfully Kurt was able to stay home. This threw off workout routines since I was up most of the night. It threw off our evening meal prep routine.
Funny thing is, this was part of Gods plan. We really had no intention on going to the marriage conference at church this weekend. It's not that we didn't want to but we couldn't really afford it and with all the prep involved in the meals we needed the weekend to do laundry, shop and prep. Well we stopped and prayed about it and decided that if God could provided funding and childcare we would go. God provided all of that!!! Then when Joseph got sick, it was a blessing in disguise because Kurt was able to get a head start on tidying the house and doing laundry while home with Joseph.
Food: I've really enjoyed most meals. I love cooking and after being scared to cook fish, I've become pretty good and it sounds good. I have not been toyed by food. I've been around be food but I've not been tempted to eat!!!
I wanted to get some thoughts down while they were on my mind. However, I'm falling asleep. I better listen and write more later.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
I Was Made For This
I was made for this.
I may want to retract that tomorrow morning when I wake up at 5:00 after my first 2 workout day but I can't get that phrase out of my head. I feel like my body is saying, "Thank you for feeding me natural foods", "Thank you for moving me around more", "Thank you for testing my limits". I'm eating delicious foods in small servings. I'm cooking and eating very few, if any processed foods. I'm taking the time to cut up veggies and prepare ahead of time.
This is not just about 'dieting', it's about changing habits and doing something long term.
I may want to retract that tomorrow morning when I wake up at 5:00 after my first 2 workout day but I can't get that phrase out of my head. I feel like my body is saying, "Thank you for feeding me natural foods", "Thank you for moving me around more", "Thank you for testing my limits". I'm eating delicious foods in small servings. I'm cooking and eating very few, if any processed foods. I'm taking the time to cut up veggies and prepare ahead of time.
This is not just about 'dieting', it's about changing habits and doing something long term.
Sunday, February 5, 2012
The Cat is Out of the Bag
Well, I did it. I stood on stage at church and let hundreds and hundreds of people know how much I weigh. The truth is, it was a freeing experience. No, really, it was. I have nothing to hide behind. I have nowhere else to go but up...well, I mean down on the scale, but up in life!!
So those of you who are following my journey but did not attend Northwood this morning are out of luck on knowing my weight. Just kidding. It's seems odd to share this with the whole world via the World Wide Web, but I pray that my journey can help others. That said, part of my journey is sharing my weight. In true Biggest Loser fashion... "Your current weight is...beep, beep, beep, beep....316 pounds".
Wait! What? 316 pounds?? Yes, 316 pounds. I used to say that because I was so tall and 'hid' my weight, I'd never share my actual weight with anybody. It may be true that I don't look like you would think 316 pounds should look like, but as I always say at work, "Data (Numbers) don't lie, but they don't tell the whole story!!". How fitting that my mantra at work totally applies to my current situation. Yes, it is just a number, but that number says a lot.
That number says,
*Jodi, you are never going to change
*Jodi, you've tried before, what would be different this time
*Jodi, you were meant to be big...you're a tall girl
*Jodi, not everybody can be skinny
*Jodi, why would you want to torture yourself with a diet
*Jodi, it's not like you'll feel any different after you lose weight
But the great thing is this: I have a God who says much more than that number.
God says,
*Jodi, now is your time for change
*Jodi, there's so much more I have planned for you
*Jodi, you are loved
*Jodi, I need you to do this so you can do My work
This week I have been preparing myself for this public journey and today it began. Thank you for supporting me and encouraging me. Stay tuned for more...
So those of you who are following my journey but did not attend Northwood this morning are out of luck on knowing my weight. Just kidding. It's seems odd to share this with the whole world via the World Wide Web, but I pray that my journey can help others. That said, part of my journey is sharing my weight. In true Biggest Loser fashion... "Your current weight is...beep, beep, beep, beep....316 pounds".
Wait! What? 316 pounds?? Yes, 316 pounds. I used to say that because I was so tall and 'hid' my weight, I'd never share my actual weight with anybody. It may be true that I don't look like you would think 316 pounds should look like, but as I always say at work, "Data (Numbers) don't lie, but they don't tell the whole story!!". How fitting that my mantra at work totally applies to my current situation. Yes, it is just a number, but that number says a lot.
That number says,
*Jodi, you are never going to change
*Jodi, you've tried before, what would be different this time
*Jodi, you were meant to be big...you're a tall girl
*Jodi, not everybody can be skinny
*Jodi, why would you want to torture yourself with a diet
*Jodi, it's not like you'll feel any different after you lose weight
But the great thing is this: I have a God who says much more than that number.
God says,
*Jodi, now is your time for change
*Jodi, there's so much more I have planned for you
*Jodi, you are loved
*Jodi, I need you to do this so you can do My work
This week I have been preparing myself for this public journey and today it began. Thank you for supporting me and encouraging me. Stay tuned for more...
Friday, February 3, 2012
What you see is what you get
I am who I am.
I am a child of God. I am loved by Him; cherished by Him. I was created in the image of God. I was born and again and washed clean. I am a new creation. I was bought with a price more costly than anything I can imagine. I am a living, breathing instrument being used to further His Kingdom.
I am me.
This journey is not all about weight loss. Just as my blog title eludes, I am embarking on a journey that will encompass all aspects of my life. My goal is to be honest and open with things as I encounter them. My goal is to share me with you.
There are thoughts constantly running thru my head the last few days. I have wanted to get them on paper, but that hasn't worked. Every time I try to sit and write, it's like my fingers don't know where to start typing. I have written 2 partial blog posts that are still in Draft form but I am determine to get at least one of them posted. Therefore, I'm going to try to get some thoughts on paper, so bare with me.
This week, I have spent lots of time in prayer. I have also spent time fending off attacks from Satan. You see, as I said earlier, this is more than just a weight-loss journey. This is a journey of freedom from food addiction, freedom from bondage that food has been in my life and freedom from the chains that all that entails. As I am trying to get free, Satan wants me to stay in my bondage; he likes me there. But God has bigger things planned for my life and God is bigger than any bondage that controls me. The hard part for me is trusting and believing that it can be overcome. In tough situations, it's easy for me to put my trust in God. It's easy for me to lean on Him when there's nowhere else to go. But when an addiction has taken over your entire life, leaning on Him becomes harder and harder because it doesn't ever seem like it will get better. I've probably said no less than 500 times that I was going to lose weight and eat healthy, only to purposely sabotage myself in order to prove that I couldn't be successful so I didn't disappoint myself. This time I'm not saying that. This time I'm saying that I'm going to allow God to work in me and thru me to make me a new creation.
One week ago, I had no idea what was about to unfold, but so far it's been amazing to see how timing and circumstances couldn't have been any better.
Thank you God for loving me enough not to give up on me and giving me another chance out.
I am a child of God. I am loved by Him; cherished by Him. I was created in the image of God. I was born and again and washed clean. I am a new creation. I was bought with a price more costly than anything I can imagine. I am a living, breathing instrument being used to further His Kingdom.
I am me.
This journey is not all about weight loss. Just as my blog title eludes, I am embarking on a journey that will encompass all aspects of my life. My goal is to be honest and open with things as I encounter them. My goal is to share me with you.
There are thoughts constantly running thru my head the last few days. I have wanted to get them on paper, but that hasn't worked. Every time I try to sit and write, it's like my fingers don't know where to start typing. I have written 2 partial blog posts that are still in Draft form but I am determine to get at least one of them posted. Therefore, I'm going to try to get some thoughts on paper, so bare with me.
This week, I have spent lots of time in prayer. I have also spent time fending off attacks from Satan. You see, as I said earlier, this is more than just a weight-loss journey. This is a journey of freedom from food addiction, freedom from bondage that food has been in my life and freedom from the chains that all that entails. As I am trying to get free, Satan wants me to stay in my bondage; he likes me there. But God has bigger things planned for my life and God is bigger than any bondage that controls me. The hard part for me is trusting and believing that it can be overcome. In tough situations, it's easy for me to put my trust in God. It's easy for me to lean on Him when there's nowhere else to go. But when an addiction has taken over your entire life, leaning on Him becomes harder and harder because it doesn't ever seem like it will get better. I've probably said no less than 500 times that I was going to lose weight and eat healthy, only to purposely sabotage myself in order to prove that I couldn't be successful so I didn't disappoint myself. This time I'm not saying that. This time I'm saying that I'm going to allow God to work in me and thru me to make me a new creation.
One week ago, I had no idea what was about to unfold, but so far it's been amazing to see how timing and circumstances couldn't have been any better.
Thank you God for loving me enough not to give up on me and giving me another chance out.
Romans 8:11
English Standard Version (ESV)
11 If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus[a] from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
A Re-birth of blogging
So, I've put off writing another blog post for nearly 8 months. Once I stopped writing it was easy not to keep writing. Between the end of Grad school, the new position at work and just getting busy, it was too easy to just ignore. It's not that I didn't want to post; it's not that I didn't have anything to share. It's just that I never made time to document things in our lives.
As you probably have seen from my posts on Facebook, I am about to start a spiritual and physical journey to wellness with the help of a friendly competition at Church themed after Biggest Loser. I am not just jumping on stage to show everybody my weight for competition's sake, I'm doing it to be able to share my story with others, to gain encouragement from those around me and to show others that they too can change. I am repurposing my Facebook 'fan' page name for this blog.
Subscribe and stay tuned to hear all about my journey to spiritual and physical obedience.
It's about to get REAL up in here!!!!
As you probably have seen from my posts on Facebook, I am about to start a spiritual and physical journey to wellness with the help of a friendly competition at Church themed after Biggest Loser. I am not just jumping on stage to show everybody my weight for competition's sake, I'm doing it to be able to share my story with others, to gain encouragement from those around me and to show others that they too can change. I am repurposing my Facebook 'fan' page name for this blog.
Subscribe and stay tuned to hear all about my journey to spiritual and physical obedience.
It's about to get REAL up in here!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)