Goals!

I met my goal by the skin of my nose!!!! So I'm down another 12 lbs to 278! Bye bye 280s!
I'm debating my next goal. I feel like 10 pounds a month should be easily attainable, however, I struggled to get 12 pounds this month. Then there's the school trip and a week of vacation. But I think I can! If I have the goal if will motivate me to make good choices!
So after much 'Jodi Logic' and rambling, my goal is to lose 10 pounds by July 31!!

The Evil Sodium Monster!

This weekend we went to Waco to see Kurt's family. We knew we would not be eating at home so I prepared my mind for making good decisions and remembering that I'm not in bondage to food. The morning started out with a failed trip to Subway because they don't open until 8! We went to IHop instead and I got a 330 calorie omelet with fruit bowl. Not bad. Lunch was ready at Kurt's mom's just 2 1/2 hrs later!! So I put only a few things on my plate and ate an early lunch and did not go back to eat more even though it was yummy! Dinner came early because by 4:30 I had already reached the hungry, grouchy stage. We went to fazolis and I got a 400 calorie ravioli. Not too bad for a day of out to eat. I thought about all my choices and purposely chose to not go for seconds and snack.
On Sunday some friends from Waco came to visit us!! It was great fun and I ate great at home...until dinner. We ended the day with the Howard's at Cabela's and went our separate ways. It was 6 and we were hungry and needed groceries so we went to Noodles and had Phó. As much as I love Phó and it's fresh ingredients, I know it has tons of sodium!
I woke up Monday morning having gained 6 pounds! At first I was so mad because I worked so hard to make good choices this weekend!! Then I realized, it was probably mostly water weight and getting upset isn't going to help anything. In fact, by midday I was already down 2 pounds as I drowned myself in water all day! I woke up Tuesday and was down another 2. Now I don't know if I'll make my goal of 278 (I was 284 this morning) by Saturday a.m. and get my massage but I'm sure going to work hard the rest of the week and know that my best reward will be being proud of myself for not giving up even if it looks hopeless!!

A Little Perspective

Sometimes it's hard to stare 'I still need to lose at least 100 more pounds' in the face even though I've already lost 50 (okay, 53)!!  So last night Kurt and I were looking at some old photos.  If you're struggling with seeing how far you've really come or with how far you really have to go, go find some old photos!!! 
Celebrate how far I've come with me!!

October 2010 - 335

November 2010 - 335

February 2012 - 316

May 2012 - 288

Long Time Coming...An Update

Okay, so I've been avoiding blogging.  I kept wanting to write but the task of catching everybody up on my progress seemed so daunting.  Today...the procrastination ends!


Seasons:  Anybody who's is 'friends' with me on Facebook, knows that I have been continuing my journey and not just given up because I haven't posted.  I have, however, been going thru different seasons.  Right after my last post, my life got drastically busier with the start of 'testing season' at school.  Since my job as Data Analyst/Test Coordinator is to organize and plan testing for all state mandated tests on campus, my job gets harder in the spring.  I was not expecting it to be quite as busy as it was, but I'm out on the other side and can tell you, I SURVIVED!!!  I will call this my season of BALANCE.  I was able to maintain my weight-loss to date (within 4 pounds up or down) and I was successfully able to not let stress effect the way I ate (most of the time).  I also had a season of DOUBT, but I'll get to that later.


90 Day Challenge:  The 90 Day Challenge that Northwood Church hosted was from March-May.  Laurie Graves did an amazing job with Spirit-Filled teaching on what the Bible says about our bodies and weight loss, as well as giving us practical tips and allowing us to have a safe place for accountability.  During the 90 Day Challenge there were some amazing life changes in people who attended.  It wasn't just about weight-loss.  Without getting your mind right, the weight-loss will be in vain.  I can happily say that even though I maintained my weight for the most part, that I worked diligently to lose my FEAR OR FAILURE that has haunted me for a long time in this journey.  I had let my fear of failure convince me to purposely sabotage my weight-loss efforts so that I had a 'reason' why I didn't lose, just in case I didn't lose.  It was a cycle of me not trusting God and believing that He would take care of me.

From February-May

Challenges:  I have struggled a little bit since summer has started.  When you have a 'spiritual high' like the 90 Day Challenge and know that you've let go of things (like my fear of failure) it's easy to live almost care-free thinking you are on top of the world!  So after the 90 Day Challenge ended, I forgot to cling to God to continue to help me and some of my old thoughts crept back in.  Thankfully I didn't gain weight back, but my mind wasn't right.  Probably, the only reason I didn't gain was that there wasn't any 'bad' food in the house...thankfully!!  It was just yesterday that I realized what I was doing, subconsciously.  I had let go of this fear of failure, but I had inadvertently thought that I could then stop clinging to God to help me...SILLY ME!!!  So, I will call this my season of DOUBT.  I am thankful for Kurt who gently pointed out to me that I had not been doing things the same as before.  


Weight Review:
335 - Early 2011
325 - January 2012
317 - February 2012
297 - March 2012
284 - CURRENTLY


That's all for now.  I will try my best to keep this updated more frequently now!  I have a goal...12 pounds by June 30th.  If I meet me goal, I get a MASSAGE!!!  I've lost 6 pounds, 6 more to go!!!

Some Deep Thoughts on Last Week

So this past week has been the very busiest in many, many years.  As test coordinator at Eastern Hills High School I am in charge of organizing, prepping and maintaining security for all the state mandated testing.  Any educators out there understand what a huge task that must be for a campus of 1200.  Plus, not to mention that this year our 9th graders are on STAAR and 10-12 are still on TAKS.  It's a crazy world.  Well, the short of it is that I had NO idea what a huge task it really was.  I knew everything that needed to be done.  I knew how to do it all.  What I didn't anticipate was how LONG everything would take!  Not to mention that the campus was crazy with 3 administrators gone all week.  So, as Tuesday night came and I HAD to have everything ready for Wednesday morning, I had a panic attack.  Almost literally.  It was 6:30 and I realized that even if I pulled an all-nighter all the labels wouldn't get on the books and answer documents and all my folders wouldn't get made.  I felt sick at my stomach and the thought of food made me want to puke even though I hadn't eaten since around 10:00 that morning.  It was in that moment that I felt like I saw a HUGE neon sign said, "Jodi, you can't do this alone.  You need help!"


I don't like to admit that I need help on something.  I like to take credit for things.  There's this guilt complex that starts to happen when I ask for help and I feel horrible for inconveniencing somebody else.  But, in this instance, I had NO choice.  I remember a co-worke/friend saying as she left for the evening, "are you sure you don't need anything else?" and like a robot I replied, "No, I'm fine".   So, while holding back tears, I called her and said I needed help.  She got dressed and came up to the school to help.  Together we did what would have taken me all night in about 2 1/2 hours!  So we left the school at 9:30 and each of us brought a few things home to complete.  On the way home, I fell apart and sobbed.  I called my sister and was so thankful she answered the phone.  She prayed for me and just listened to me vent almost the entire way home.  I am so blessed to have her to call and any time when I need it.  As soon as I got home I fell apart again in Kurt's arms.  I think I'd been holding that cry in for a good while.  He took everything out of my hands, made me sit at the kitchen table and eat something.  Again, I'm so blessed to be surrounded by so much support!  So thinking back to my feelings: I felt stupid for not asking for help sooner (part of it was pride but part of it was honestly not knowing how long it would take).  But now I know!!  I know I must rely on others. 


Now isn't that so much like our spiritual life?  Are you like me and don't feel worthy to ask for help spiritually.  In meditating on these thoughts this week, I found that this 'not asking for help' thing is a major issue for me.  I feel bad when I ask for a prayer request.  How silly is that?  I guess I'm just a 'jolly Jodi' and so when I have an issue I try to see the best in it.  That doesn't make sense.  Anyway, I've yet to get to the root of all of this in my life, but I have committed to try to more transparent with my needs.  What are your thoughts?  Any suggestions for getting out of this 'not seeking help' complex I have discovered I have?  


So, as far as weight-loss goes this week....I didn't lose anything.  I gained 1 pound.  I didn't workout at all.  I was up until almost 1am every night and out the door at 5:30 every morning getting things ready for the testing.  I tried to eat good, but I often had to settle for a Lara Bar or Cliff Bar instead of my salad and veggies.  So overall I'm happy to have only gained 1 pound. I  was afraid that after 4 weeks of being so strict that my body would revolt and gain a lot.  Since I was kind of out of it nutrition-wise last week, I'm finding it hard to kick back into it.  I don't want to go to the gym.  But I will and I am in the morning.  I'm just hoping that once I go tomorrow morning I will live off that adrenaline feeling and will yearn for it again.  I'm not stopping by any means, just feeling less motivated.

Blessings, Surprises and an Update

You know, when I started this journey I knew I was supposed to do this, however, I had NO idea that impact that would be had on those around me.  I also had no idea how blessing would be turned right around on me.  Let me share a few things with you.

Yesterday while heading to Kroger Marketplace to get groceries for our week, I realized I needed gas.  I pulled up to the Kroger gas station and politely (or not so politely) handed Kurt my Kroger Plus Card so he could get gas.  He was in the middle of writing a message on his phone so I hop out to pump gas (but admitingly not happy with it).  Anyway, I get out and start pumping and a gentleman approaches me.  He asks if I go to Northwood Church.  I say yes and he proceeds to tell me how he thinks I'm such an inspiration and he admires my bravery.  WOW, what a surprise!  A complete stranger approaching me about getting up on stage and sharing my weight-loss with everyone.  I knew people I know are supporting me but it's really cool to think that complete strangers are rooting for me too!  After I got back in the car I realized why I was supposed to be the one pumping gas last night!

We've received many blessing this past week as well.  I want to share them with you so you can rejoice in what God is doing in our lives.

• Somebody has purchased me the knee brace that I needed!
• We received a gift card to Sprouts!
• We received spending cash for Kurt's trip to Vietnam and a small stash for me!
• We received money to purchase Kurt a new professional wardrobe!

God is so good!!  Kurt's work clothes no longer looked professional because they were all baggy.  Our grocery budget has slightly expanded and I really needed a knee brace to maximize my workouts!  

Also a weight-loss update.  I lost 3 pounds this week!!  This week has literally been the busiest all school year for me as Test Coordinator and Data Analyst and I'm thrilled to have lost 3 pounds.  I was only able to make it to two of our three workouts and I only went to the gym one morning.  Next week will look very similar to this past week.  I'm so ready for Spring Break....5 more days!!!!!!

Over But Not Done!

Okay, so the 'Losing It' series at church is done, however my journey is very far from done.  I hope that you continue to follow my journey.

This week Kurt and I are doing a cleanse with a no meat and no carbs (except from veggies).  It's amazing how little can satisfy me now.  I mean, in a heart beat I could stuff my face but the actual amount of food that it takes to satisfy me is not much.  On Sunday Pastor Bob talked about following God's plan should be a continual state of rest.  Although this week is absolutely crazy-busy at work with the first HUGE TAKS test coming next week,  feel at peace and restful with the way things are going.  Today while working, I was beginning to maybe see part of the bigger picture of things in my life.  It was encouraging.

Workouts this week are lighter due to the lower amount of food we are eating.  Tonight's workout was tough, but mostly because my body was a little weaker.  I would have flat passed out if we had worked as hard as last week tonight!!  Speaking of hard workouts last week.  I was so proud of myself for climbing the BIG hill on Saturday.  It was so hard.  I literally had to keep reminding myself that I just had to put one foot in front of the other.  I was out of breath; I was sweating profusely; every muscle in my body ached.  But I did it.  I climbed that hill 3 times!!  This is the top of the hill.  That little bitty park just off my right shoulder is the bottom!!